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Forgiveness


A friend of mine asked me to write anything about "forgiveness", and it took me two weeks to decide that at the end I can write what I feel, not what I think. Because writing is only sincere when it's talking on behalf of your heart, just like forgiveness is only true when it's coming from the heart as well.

And hey! That's the equation: I can't write about forgiveness. It almost left my heart and made estate in my mind. I'm consciously forgiving every one, in every day and in every moment. I deliberately know that I won't carry my grudge further after my death, and that no matter how big is my anger if one day they stand before me I will let go. That's what "I" will do. But "me" have a different point of view and can only keep it inside. Because what has marked several situations between some people and "me" was mostly that "I" didn't insist on getting, "I" always favorited giving, on the expense of "me ". 

"I" am so conscious that this is too much for "me", and that a certain point "I" should start caring about "me" first. And I am conscious that this is a fair deal when everyone in this world bears his own burden and I don't necessarily have to carry it with him. 

If I sign up for that deal, will I finally live in peace with "me" and live without that guilt?

Is forgiveness a guilt or virtue? 

They taught us that it's rather a good thing, a virtue, but the further my trip in this world goes, the more I feel it's just a comfort zone to freeze egos and repress them from converting this small planet into a big jungle where revenge is a currency, where fear is the barrier to actions, and where "they" matter only through the damage they could eventually cause. 

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